Now that’s the Onion of my father’s America…

The Onion: Pitchfork gives music 6.8.

Love it.

Oh, and on a related note, how come Pitchfork started only covering adult contemporary and hipster metal? It’s like the unemployed, 24-year old asshole version of me is editing that thing. Come to think of it, that’s probably not far from the truth.

Just because I love you all, I thought I’d share one of my favorite Onion articles of all time while I’m at it:

Five Or Six Dudes Jump Out Of Nowhere And Just Start Whaling On This One Guy

May 31, 2000 | Issue 36•20

BOULDER, CO–Shock and disbelief were the prevailing reactions Monday, when pizza-delivery guy Lyle Kelso, 24, reported to roommates that at around 2 or 3 a.m., he personally witnessed, like, five or six dudes suddenly jump out of freakin’ nowhere and just start totally whaling on this one guy. Continued here.

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